Children at Italian Weddings

Whether or not children belong at a wedding depends entirelly on the happy couple and guests should always respect their choice.

Sure, weddings are family events and it certainly makes sense to include young people to be part of the ceremony and reception. Most of the time children are adorable and can be the protagonists of very cute and funny moments but some other time they can turn an happy occasion in a real nightmare!

It's nothing new that young children may be bored amongst too many adults or get tired and annoyed or just have tantrums because they do not like the food which is served at the wedding reception.

There are many pros and cons to have kids at a wedding and both the happy couple and the children parents must be fully aware of it!

If the newlyweds decide not to include children at their wedding because they are concerned that uncontrolled children could be disruptive of the ceremony or the reception, they must inform long before hand their guests. The etiquette says that the couple should clearly state on their wedding invitations that children are not welcome at weddings ("Adult only ceremony and reception"),or they could simply opt not to add children names. Anyway, it's certainly better to inform family and friends with children and explain them directly and tactfully that due to the solemnity of the celebration you prefer not to include children at the wedding. Don't forget that a good excuse can be that many couple have a limited budget and they can afford to have a separate special menu for children or that the venue you've chosen for the reception has only limited places...

Couple should always be always straightforward with children's parents... sometimes they might feel offended and insulted by your decision but it's better than having to deal with kids'tantrums and scenes during your wedding...can youo imagine having children roaming around, throwing pieces of cakes to other children or adult guests, screaming or crying for the entire day???

Luckily this is not always the case and children could be a real blessing to add fun and tenderness and love to such a happy occasion as a wedding. But if the happy couple decides to include children at their wedding they must be aware of the possibility of some umpredictable moments. In order to avoid unhappy surprises it is important to assign to young guests a role and teach them the part they will play at your wedding.

Younger children could be flower girl, ring bearer, readers, bouquet holder or junior bridesmaids or groomsmen. if they practice their part before hand and you make them feel loved and important they won't disappoint you. Show them where they need to sit during the ceremony (better if in the last rows) and provide them with a book, a toy to keep them busy during the ceremony.

It'd be also sensitive to assign young guests a helper, ideally a volonteer teen-ager or an adult that will keep an eye on them during the ceremony and the reception, a baby sitter is definetly the best solution and why not to consider to hire a clown or a magician to make them happy and amused during the reception? Provide them with a change of clothes so they'll feel more confortable to play during the reception, set them a separate table with a special menu and organise lots of stimulating activities to involve them with (colouring books, building blocks, books and games, disposable cameras...) If they feel comfortable and part of the party (do not refuse them a dance!) you won't have to worry about their behaviour.Be patient and keep a good sense of humour! do not stay longer than necessary if your child becomes tired and over-excited...follow these few easy guidelines and your little angels will make your day a true special one!!!

The insider's guide to wedding on the Italian Lakes - Destination weddings Italy - P.I. 01144000039